


Dragon Slayer

by MissKittyFantastico



Category: Pro Wrestling Guerrilla, World Wrestling Entertainment, 新日本プロレス | New Japan Pro-Wrestling
Genre: (In which Xavier and Kenny are NSP), Crack, Cute boys in dragon onesies, F/M, Ninja Sex Party AU, failed attempt at flirting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2016-11-20
Packaged: 2018-09-01 01:34:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8601991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissKittyFantastico/pseuds/MissKittyFantastico
Summary: Candice is pretty sure this Xavier Sexbang dude is full of it.





	

**Author's Note:**

> So for some reason, I got this mental image in my head the other day of Xavier Woods and Kenny Omega as Ninja Sex Party. Since I can't draw, I guess I settled for very dumb fic instead.
> 
> Also, [iggypup87 photoshopped a screen cap from the 'Dragon Slayer' video for me](https://twitter.com/jayjackets/status/800217002300182528), so I pretty much had to do it.

“So… you’re a dragon slayer,” Candice asked incredulously.

Xavier laughed haughtily as he leaned in closer to her. “I am. Just as Ninja Kenny over here. He helped.”

Candice looked over at his friend, a muscular man in all black with curly hair, a scarf pulled up over his nose, and dark aviators. He just shrugged and Xavier sighed. “He’s a man of few words, unfortunately.”

“Uh huh.”

“But! I can take you to meet this dragon for yourself!”

Okay, now this Xavier dude was full of shit. Well, he was full of shit when he claimed he had won the Super Bowl in a one versus eleven handicap game, that he could bench press the United States, and had a mansion orbiting earth, but now he was _definitely_ full of shit.

Still, Candice considered herself a believer in magical things and fairy tales as well as a destroyer of men. It couldn’t hurt to see where he was going with this. “Show me your dragon…”

“Uh, do you mean the actual dragon or my…”

“THE ACTUAL DRAGON.”

“Oh, right! Ninja Kenny, let’s show this lovely lady the beast!”

Candice was about 95% certain Ninja Kenny rolled his eyes under his sunglasses, but got up and directed Candice towards the backyard anyway. She sighed as she took a sip from her cup. She just wanted to come out to a party to see her friends and share her cupcakes, but nooo, she had a weirdo in a kimono and his weirder ninja friend hitting on her.

“Behold,” Xavier exclaimed as he walked out onto the porch with a sweeping arm gesture. “It is the beast slain by I, Xavier Sexbang! With help from Ninja Kenny of course…”

Candice groaned as she looked at the sight in front of her. “Are you kidding me, man?”

Instead of a brilliant and demonic dragon, there was a bearded guy with floppy hair in a dragon onesie growling and making claw hands. “Grrr… I am a ferocious dragon! I am ready to burninate your village.”

“See,” Xavier exclaimed. “I told you he was dangerous.”

Candice was about ready to dump the rest of her drink over Xavier’s kimono and shoes when she looked at the dragon and recognized something familiar about him. “Ohmigod, Johnny?”

The dragon looked up, looking suddenly embarrassed. “Candice?”

“I knew I recognized you,” she said as she bounded over to him. “How have you been?”

“Alright, I guess,” Johnny said with a shrug. “I mean, I could be better. I’m hanging out in a dragon suit after this guy paid me twenty bucks at the bus station.”

He pointed towards Xavier, who shushed him. “We said we wouldn’t mention that,” he said in a stage whisper.

“Well, how about you tell me about it over cupcakes,” Candice said, taking Johnny by the arm. “I brought some to this party I would love for you to try.”

Johnny blushed a little bit as he walked back in towards the party with Candice. Xavier just sighed as he watched them walk off. “I guess some women really do prefer monsters, Kenny.”

He then tried to put his arm around Kenny, but Kenny quickly revealed a knife and pointed it towards him. Xavier moved his arms away in surrender. “Alright, alright, no touching. Sorry.”


End file.
